Second Resolution for 2009

For my second new years resolution, I told the Lord that I want to eat healthier, lose weight and maintain it with a continued healthy eating plan. Now once I had my kids, I blew up. And I really blew up. I believe that my deep rooted reason for using food as a defense mechanism was to help myself deal with possible rejection by someone I wanted to accept me. In the United States of America, we have a fixation with weight and as such I sought to destroy the notion of anyone rejecting me, whether it be my family, friends, strangers, society, etc. by doing what I could to deal with the possible rejection by looking as someone who instantly is scorned. I know this sounds crazy but it is amazing how the brain or emotions seek to deal with it's issues.

As you can see, I am the direct opposite of what someone would normally do when faced with issues. Most people will do what is necessary to fit into all of the stereotypes that depict what is acceptable in life and society. But me because I am such a unique character and different in all ways, by no means average, I would do the opposite of others. This also helped me ot be the best person from the inside because I only sought a few people to associate with on a regular basis and the others I did not have to deal with because they were prejudiced against me in the beginning. Off the bat I was judged, so I did not have to deal with their issues or their fake want to do something for you. I basically understand now that I want realness and judging someone based on color, size, economic status, education level, etc. is so fake and tired.

But in all of my doing things opposite, God showed me how to do things in a positive way to reach my goals in life and with people. He taught me not to destroy myself to deal with life and expectations or other people's issues. So my second resolution is to deal with rejection in a positive way and not go down a hill of unhealthy habits. Now I am seeking to exercise with a program called sit and be fitter. As you can see I am not a mobile person and as such need to do exercises that assist me to reach a healthy mobility level. Also I am on a healthy eating plan. Now some people just need to limit what they eat, but I had to change my habits all together. Instead of eating a large amount each time ate, I am eating 8 times a day basically snacking on things, like carrots, yogurt, salad, cereal bars, drinking lots of water, crackers, tuna fish, and one meal at dinner which may or may not consist of meat. It is working wonders for me because I feel good already and have not had to take any sleeping pills to sleep. So it is working out fine. Anyhoo, until tomorrow, when I let you know my last and final new years resolution, have a great day and stay blessed and joyful. Surabi